The Best Advice I Ever Received

January 12, 2026

"Strong Opinions Weakly Held"

The best advice I ever received in my career was during my internship. I was a recent graduate and trying to learn my way into a full-time job. It was the first conversation I can remember with my boss, Nate Cavanaugh, and I had proposed using JQuery over YUI because I thought I knew what I was talking about(I didn't). Nate patiently listened to my request and asked helpful questions to help me think through it better. It became clear in our discussion that I was clueless and he obviously knew what he was talking about, but for some reason I thought I should still stick to my guns. He was gracious in conversation and at the end of the conversation he gave me advice "pursue strong opinions, weakly held."

It really stuck with me, I couldn't get that phrase out of my head. In fact, I think I have thought of that phrase at least once a week for the past 12 years. I don't know if he coined the phrase or heard it from somewhere else, but I do know what it has meant to me. It has struck me all these years because I think it gives a mental model for decision making and problem solving. There are a million ways to solve a given problem, there is no one "silver bullet" and in programming we often have to weigh those solutions all the time.

Strong Opinions

It is important to have a strong opinion, meaning that we should be rooted in our opinion and have a reason why that opinion exists. Build up that opinion, bolster your reasoning and logic behind why that opinion exists. Having a strong opinion doesn't necessarily mean you need to have a loud opinion, I think a the strength comes from your reason, not your volume. We all know the difficulties of interacting with someone who has a loud opinion but not a strong one, how incredibly frustrating that can be. So without being loud and obnoxious, pursue strong opinions. However, we also need the other side of the coin, we need to hold them with an open hand.

Weakly Held

Holding weakly to that opinion. This means that we can't hold to it so tight that we lose the ability to reason and listen. For example, when I had that conversation with Nate, I held tightly to the idea that JQuery was the way to go because it fit one use case, but I really had no other reasons for it. I clung to it tightly just because of one API I wanted, I hadn't really considered any other reasons not to use it. But I was holding tightly to that one reason which didn't really allow me to listen.

Holding our opinions weakly allows us to hear and listen better. If we aren't so rigid and stuck in our ways, we allow for the ability to see contrasting sides of opinions and weigh other reasons. For example, Nate demonstrated this in our conversation, he had excellent reasons for YUI over JQuery, but he was still willing to listen and hear what I had to say. He didn't just dismiss me and send me on my way.

Life

But a big part of why this has stuck with me over the years is because it isn't just about programming. It is a framework of thinking that really can apply to all areas of life and my boss Nate embodied this so well. I can remember many times talking with him on Friday's at the company happy hour about all sorts of things. He had strong opinions about movies, art, religion, politics, programming, and everything else you can imagine. But he held those things weakly, he listened and was gracious. He took interest in other opinions and would re-shape his opinion depending on the strength of information he took in from those around him. I worked with Nate for about half of my time at Liferay and though I didn't work on projects directly with him much, I credit him for a lot of growth in my career. I learned much from Nate not just in conversation, but by seeing how he treated others and how he really embodied his advice. He is greatly missed and I hope I can continue to embody "strong opinions, weakly held".